part 19 -

pet the kitty.
xian influx into the culture it feasts upon with the inhabitants unknowing of the nature of the cause of their disease.
not going too far or not going far enough?
peculiar misuse of sacrificial funds to protect the ignorance of the masses from discovering secrets of the journey of their submission to authority.
it's quite a natural thing to humans it would seem.
we love our rulers though also fear, as we love and fear our gods.
x - unknown variable in an equation.
xian - follower of x.
xianity - rhymes with insanity.
who's who here now?
let's see a show of hands.
yes, just as we thought.
we are them.

how can it be any other way?|
we look under the table and see nothing.
we look to the sky and see brilliant rainbows.
it can be difficult to fathom. all is emptiness. what does x equal? our joy? our suffering? our mediocre lives?
x equals anything, up to and including everything.
simplistic irrationalogic reasoning.
we're just following instructions. but this is something we could might believe.
x is almost as compelling as 0 - almost.
x=0...
everything everywhere everywhen measured by 0.
0 is arbitrary.
we place value to it, as we place meaning to gazorbnik. the two are closely related though not entirely the same.
the crowd applauds what is beyond their sense of reason to comprehend. it wouldn't be the 1st time.
up all night the clown is sleepy at dawn.
he goes for a walk around the park. it kinda wakes him up. but he barely makes it around once. too many cigarettes of late as he lights up another.
then he sleeps.

/./

awakening to coffee, toke, cigarette.
the trash was picked up and now the recycling truck rolls in.
mean people nasty violent fuckers on every side of the equations of human behavior. action/reaction. is there any way violence is good? to win the war to reap the profits? what's the difference between that and evil? evil is just trying to do the same. history is written by the victors, and all that. everything we have learned are lies.
no such thing as good and evil but in our crazy heads trying to make sense of it. but if we're honest then there is no sense at all. but imagine telling others that. they'll kill your motherfucking ass - or just walk away laughing.
it's the real world, baby. ain't no room for excuses.

no peace, no love, nor understanding.
whip it out.
get down to it.
beware, no monkey business is strictly enforced.
read between the lines up and down and all around.
empathetic discord of discriminating vectors plausible pussy outcome decreased by cock factors notwithstanding anal fortitude functions easily perturbed punching cum reflex into far reaching altitudes for the average escape tit nozzle.
let's get outta here, baby!
now!

no need to surrender. who do we surrender to? (to whom do we surrender?) those days are gone. nothing's in synch anymore. it's all discombobulated with itself like an oncoming derailed freight train in a long dark tunnel. is this the way to the party in heaven?
who's playing a flute this time of night? or is the day merely darkened by the shadow of our sorrow?
the adventure has only barely begun and already there's shady business about.
when will we ever get it right? be happy that you're miserable. you're alive, ain't ya?
keep on dancing.
follow the direction of transmitted instructions and become a rebel. you know you wanna. it's easy here on easy street. meet the blessed and the cursed.
it's medication time!

cheap imitation poltergeist pigmentations erupting from left eye the cow stumbles downhill into a creek entangled in barbed wire on the portal of a dream.
spit in the face.
incredible feats of tricky bullshit expounding the latest development of dog left in car barking.
compliments to the chef.
asking a lot of stupid questions when we don't really have the time. we're so so busy. we don't play those games much anymore. not since we've been so busy busy.
falling off a log philosophy into a quagmire of possibilities resulting in our corny comical confusion of doubts.
absolute betrayal coming down enough from great hubris including jerking kicking licking much nonsense observing peculiar quiet robot sex transforming universal victims watching x-ray yelling zebras.

a few days later -

the clown's got nothing...

and the day after that -

awakening.
coffee, toke, cigarette.
medications.
he naps.

awakening.
coffee, toke, cigarette.
been having trouble awakening and staying awake of late. naps are good. being awake between them is good too. but a 1/2 pot of coffee and still, zzzzzz...
he tries to make it different this time.
he really wants to go back to bed but he continues not p0em anyway.

and he can't seem to think. maybe it's mind control rays dampening our brains like many believe. it's possible. what will they think up next?
it's a lost cause probably. but what was it to begin with? when the corporatestate turns dystopian against us while everything seems hunky dory. fuckers.
what do we do?
follow leaders?
march in the streets?
or watch it all on tv? whatever they decide to show us, if anything.
nothing going on here.
he wonders why people need to be this way, but he knows the answer. becuz they can.
there will always be the selfish and the greedy among us who don't give a shit about the rest but only their own gain. and flowers grow on the hillside beneath the burning flags right next to where the dairy farm used to be that now a top secret installation is located. concrete and windowless. security cameras. signs prohibiting photographs. chugalug.

he naps.

another thing, it's hot. that'll knock you out too. whatever. lethargic latitudes. anger. spaghetti butter garlic parmesan. ugh.

he naps.

awakening and he's still tired. he tries to fight it off. coffee is old and burnt. a toke and cigarette.
even the interwebs are sluggish. he glugs some water. a taste of summer. sweat. oh boy.
his head feels like a lead weight. drooping. dim and drowsy. the greedy are the true criminals but unfortunately they have all the $$$ so nothing can be done against them. they laugh at our revolting antics. they are able to wait it out. generations if need be.
the blindless waste. the discovery of frozen time, yet our theory has always sorta predicted it.
a theory of gazorbnik.
a report to the committee.

he sleeps.